So… I checked out M’s business websites last night. Ended up buying a couple of shirts from one. I’m not expecting to hear from him, that’s not why I bought them. I know he was getting things going end of last year, happy to see he followed through on something. Looks like he’ll have a podcast as well…. Yep, I’m a little bitter. Our projects, he’s gone ahead with. I’m sure with K’s help. I knew he’d jump back into talking with her. I followed the social media tags and she’s following him on at least one of his Pinterests. He also has a few new friends on his Facebook..

I hate feeling like this, I’m a jealous bitch. On the other hand, I’m not dwelling on it. Doesn’t sound like it, but honestly, this is just me venting. That night was bad, and although I know I could have handled things differently, I still stand my ground about his shitty behavior. Not to mention, everything else.

We all make choices, we don’t always get to fix them. He’s doing what he needs to, has who he wants in his life and maybe even a special someone or two. I’m not waiting, but will always be here.

I ventured into the chat room last night before I went on his stuff. I really was hoping not to see him, honest! A few minutes in, a girl asked if I lived in Oregon. Weird, but I said no. A few minutes later she’s asking the room where M had been. Coincidence? I stick to the Singles room, he never goes in there.

I feel like this is it. I served my purpose

I know, a sad post, but I need to send it out into the void. Otherwise it’ll infect every part of me

I love you M, you’re my sunflower 🌻